SMART Dating

Safe…Mutually…Affirming…Relationships for…Teens

"...to educate, to empower, to end domestic violence..."

23875 Commerce Park Road Beachwood. Ohio 44122

(216) 831-5440

A United Way Agency

Contract Agency of the Alcohol and Drug Addiction Services Board of

Cuyahoga County

 

ABUSIVE DATING RELATIONSHIPS WHAT TO DO

 

IF YOU ARE BEING ABUSED:

IF YOU ARE AN ABUSER:

IF YOUR FRIEND IS BEING ABUSED:

Take it seriously.

Say to yourself, "I have a problem. I am abusive."

 

Help your friend recognize

the abuse.

 

Tell your abuser the violence must stop

Make a commitment to yourself: "I will not force sex or hit anyone."

 

Support your friend's strengths.

Say it clearly if you do not

want sex.

 

Call a hotline.

Be non-judgmental.

Plan for your safety.

 

Find a counselor or support group.

Help your friend with safety plans.

Tell your parents or a trusted adult.

 

Talk to parents, friends and/or other adults about your problem.

Be there. Listen.

Call the police or other authorities.

Learn as much as you can about abusive relationships.

Help your friend talk to adults to get help.

Call a hotline.

Go to Alcoholics Anonymous or a drug program if you are abusing substances.

 

If your friend breaks up with the abuser, keep up the support.

Find a counselor or support group.

Learn to respect others.

If you become frightened or frustrated, get support from friend and family members or other adults.

Talk to friends.

Learn to respect yourself. You CAN choose not to abuse.

 

 

Do things for yourself that make

you feel stronger.

 

 

Take a self-defense class.

 

 

 

SMART DATING QUESTIONNAIRE FOR TEENS

Does the Person You Date:

1.        Constantly put you down?                                                                                                    Yes     No

2.        Get really jealous?                                                                                                                  Yes     No

3.        Threaten to hurt you, your pet, family or friends?                                                                Yes     No

4.        Keep you from spending time with family or friends?                                          Yes     No

5.        Insist that you dress or wear your hair a certain way?                                          Yes     No

6.        Have sudden bursts of anger?                                                                                 Yes     No

7.        Insist you kiss or do sexual things you don’t want to?                                          Yes     No

8.        Break your things or go through your purse?                                                                         Yes     No

9.        Hit, punch, slap, kick or shove you when jealous/angry?                                      Yes     No

10.     Keep you from going where you want to go?                                                                        Yes     No

11.     Humiliate or embarrass you in front of others?                                                      Yes     No

 

Are You:

12. Afraid to disagree with your date?                                                                                      Yes     No               

13.  Always worried about hurting your date’s feelings?                                                          Yes     No

14.  Making excuses for your date’s behavior to others?                                          Yes     No

 

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may be in on abusive relationship.

 

 

Where to find help:

  • Center for Prevention of Domestic Violence (216) 831-5440
  • 24 Hour Battered - Women's Hotline (216) 391-HELP (V/TDD)
  • Cleveland Rape Crisis Center (216)619-6194
  • 24 Hour Rape Crisis Hotline (216)619-6192

·        Templum Adolescent Intervention Program (216) 651-8484

·          Project Chai Crisis Hotline 216)691-7233